Eighteen....

It's here at last. Adulthood. Eighteen

Even the word scares the living shit out of me. I'm eighteen. I'm an adult, but still a boy. I'm not prepared for adulthood. Not by a long shot. I am supposed to be responsible and supposed to have everything figured out like all my class-mates seem to have accomplished, But i have not. I have nothing figured out, not even remotely. 

I spent the past few months wrestling with the idea of holding off college for a semester or two.To go to the music festival Bonnaroo, a giant music and comedy 4 day concert, featuring my favorite musicians of all time. Mumford and Sons, and last but not least. Paul Mccartney. The festival ends a few days before graduation and after the graduation hoo plah is over, I'd like to spend my summer working in Alaska then in the fall to move to the warmer climes of the south west and maybe work down in Arizona until i got bored and decide to keep tramping around.

I don't know what exactly what i want to do, Even the things i do know i want to do, i have no plans in order, absoluetly none. But i guess that's the beauty in it. I don't want to know what I'm doing or where I am going. I want to live on the lamb. To be on the run from cumbersome expectations and responsibilities. To really find an unknown part of my self, to broaden my horizons and feed & cleanse my spirit and in the process , find out the true meaning of living; to live the lives of men i only read about & to write about my adventures. I have since decided I'll go to a year of school and then do something crazy after my first year of college. Spend my summer in Alaska? Maybe walk some of the Pacific Crest Trail? I don't know all i do know is if i stay in Buffalo too long my head will explode. 

My young adult-boyhood craves total freedom and adventure. An absence from the norm; an abundance of fresh new experiences. Most of my childhood i was constantly bombarded by new people and places which added to my knowledge bucket and is why i have such itchy feet. I've been at the same place with the same people for the past 6 years. I am overdue. I'm an experience junkie. i thrive on ever changing horizons and i feel an adventure or two would be good for my mind and spirit. 

I seemed to go off on a bit of a tangent, but these are the main issues i face in my life as a boy-adult. Hopefully i can make it through this first year of school without going nuts, and live the life i want thereafter. To live unencumbered and most of all to live free and happy.

My Take On God.

My Take on God 

               God. What a concept. Something that has started wars, persecution and genocide over the millennia, but who is god? What is god? Where is god? Is there even such as thing as god and if so, whose is right? These are the questions I believe every active thinker should ask.
              Over the centuries there have been many forms of religion and evolution of the belief of “god”. From the ancient Greek gods to modern day Allah. Today many of the most notable religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Christianity and Islam all believe in the same god, but have vastly different variations of his message. The big question is, is he real? Well scientifically speaking, I do not think so. No one being made the universe by hand from scratch. The concept of a god contradicts all modern science, and cannot be backed up by any proof or evidence, only ones faith.  Personally speaking I do not believe god as a being that many of the modern day churches believe, but I believe him to be more of a manifestation of man’s imagination.

                God was created because he gives people guidance and hope. His prophets help establish a moral code to man and promises of eternal life to all who follow the path of the righteous. This eternal life gives men something to look forward too, and lessens the effect death can have on one’s consciousness.  For a species that is so accustomed to death and hardship, god and religion are the perfect answers. He acts as a shoulder to lean on, a person to talk to and even a scapegoat. He is the good Sheppard who leads his flock, the king who cares for his people. God is man’s answer for everything, and without god who knows where man would be, but it probably would not be a positive place that’s for sure, because no matter what it comes down too religion has always helped people in turmoil.

                Just because I do not believe in god as a person or creator, does not mean I don’t believe in him at all. God is within us all, he gives us hope, strength, faith and discipline He is our soul and our spirit, he is the fabric that keeps all life on earth wound together and intertwined. Many people in this day and age I think, would believe in this too. People are no longer mindless sheep following the every word of an organization, people now ask questions and find answers and although god may not exist, he is one of human kind’s greatest ideas and without god our species would be lost.